January 19, 2012

Val Mesmo: Go Then

(c) 2011

When I fuck you, it is Mardi Gras in my head—

sweet,

with my mask secure, and you

 

like a slide trombone,

a pandeiro, reco-reco in your hips.

 

I put it down—down

like a samba,

its pulse the beginning

of our everything.

 

With my mask secure—

there it is—

one rabid mask or another,

trepidation hidden

behind yellow feathers.

 

My mouth, which would say

I am about more than this,

is buried in the pillow,

my hair caught in my teeth like reins.

 

Jesus, pinch me again.  

 

Your touch tears through me,

yet it isn’t all that I want. 

 

The sun has gone down—

or is about to rise,

I’ve forgotten where in the world I live. 

Seattle—Brazil?  

 

Quero você, doce amor. 

 

This heat, this funk—

it pervades the room

and you are telling me again

you need to go? 

 

You leave—

my juice slathered on your skin;

a trace of me

under your nails—

evidence--

a crime scene.   

 

What will your wife say?

 

When we fuck

it is Carnival, and in my head

I hide my fears

under feathers,

sequins.

 

Wherever you touch—

gimme, gimme, gimme.

 

I am hungry.

 

Your leaving tears me up—

this is not what I want.

 

I want to be seen with you. 

I want to be seen by you,

unmasked.

 

Your scent on my hands,

the ache where my jeans ride up—

you know where I live.

 

You need to stay.